Reflections

As many of you know, I have Rheumatoid Arthritis. It's been a...difficult adjustment to say the least. But I have had some really amazing experiences with it as well. Last night I was reading in the scriptures and I came across a couple chapters that talk of how the Lord chasteneth his people because he loves them. This made me stop and reflect on all the trials I have had and what I have learned from them. It was easy to think of things I've learned from trials that are past and over, no matter how difficult they were at the time. But it was more difficult to see what I've learned and how I've grown with this arthritis. Maybe I haven't been humble enough.
The miracle came after I pondered a while and things started coming to my mind. I was amazed at the ways I have been blessed and the things I've experienced and learned. I have discovered that my life is as good as it is BECAUSE of the Arthritis. For instance: I am a better mother than I would have been without the arthritis. Sure it makes things difficult, but I have to prioritize what I can do because I can only do so much, so I have to make sure the important things get done first. It has strengthened my marriage. I appreciate Michael so much more for what he does for me, that I can't do for myself. I also appreciate the things I CAN do, because I've experienced losing the ability to do them: simple things like buttoning buttons, opening cans, wearing shoes, and lifting Evelyn out of her crib. Most importantly, I have learned of God's love for me. I know He is there for me and has strengthened me countless times.
I never would have thought of bad health as a blessing before. It reminds me of Liberty Jail and how they call it the "Temple Prison." We really do learn the most from our hardest trials. It is our price to get acquainted with God, and if you think about it that way, it's so much easier to accept His will.
Thank you to everyone who has helped me during my hard times and encouraged me when I have been down. It's been hard learning to accept being on the receiving end of service, but I can't express how much your service has been appreciated.