Sins of the Parents

Every year when I was growing up, my dad would take me out to dinner for a birthday present. It was a special time which I loved. You see, having grown up at the bottom of a family of nine children, we rarely had the resources to go out to eat. But not only would my dad take me out, he would take me to a sit-down restaurant, not just a fast food. It was a momentous occasion to look forward to. I always carefully planned where we would go out to eat, and, being a growing girl who loved food and lots of it, I usually decided on an all-you-can-eat place like Golden Corral or Sizzler.
As much as I cherished this one-on-one time with my dad, there was one small part of the experience I didn't particularly relish. I would go out and come back with my plate heaping full of all my favorite delights and he'd take one look at my plate and say: "Why are you eating all the cheapest things?! This is an all-you-can-eat restaurant and you are going to fill up on rolls, mashed potatoes, corn and cookies?!" Then an argument would ensue. "Dad, I LIKE these foods!" "But you should fill up on the more expensive things like meat!" "But I don't like any of the meat!" "Well, how are we going to get our money's worth when you are filling up on fluffy rolls!?" "Why don't YOU eat our money's worth, dad?" So he would try, and I'd feel bad, so I'd try to make up for my cheap meal by putting lots of sunflower seeds on my salad. Sunflower seeds are expensive, right?
Anyway, through the years, I learned more and more how to eat my "Money's worth." But sadly now I don't enjoy going to all-you-can-eat restaurants anymore, because even though I have married and left my parents, whenever I'm in those joints, I can feel this little daddy-devil sitting on my shoulder yanking on my ear lobe and shouting: "HAVE ANOTHER HELPING OF SHRIMP, PAM!" And I obey, even though I don't even like shrimp that much.
Today, for instance, My mother-in-law and I went out to lunch to Pier 49 and ordered the all-you-can-eat meal. I wasn't too worried because it was Pier 49 and I love Pier 49. But as soon as my stomach began to feel like it was ready to quit, that little daddy devil showed up and said: "You only ate four pieces of pizza! For that price you could have ordered a whole pizza and saved leftovers for lunch!" So reluctantly I went back for more. I ended up eating six very large pieces of sourdough pizza smothered in toppings and fattiness. So my daddy may rest assured that he instilled in his daughter the trait of eating her money's worth. But really all he gave me was a legacy of heartburn.