Impending DOOM! (Pretend the font is scarier)

Parenthood. It just keeps getting more interesting the closer Evelyn gets to 2 years old. She signs just great now and we can typically understand what she wants, but now signing is "Old School!" she refuses to do it, because talking is "In!" The only problem is: she can't talk. She only thinks she can. So when you try and get her to say something, it goes as follows:

Momma: "Evelyn, say 'I...'"
Evelyn: "VVVVuh!"
Momma: "...Want..."
Evelyn: "Gush!"
Momma: "...To Color!"
Evelyn: (Shriek, Giggles.)
Momma: "Can you say 'please?'"
Evelyn: (gurgles in the back of her throat, more resembling a dog growling than a word.)


As you can see, it's not the most adult conversation, and it gets even worse when she's trying to ask for something by herself. A game of 150 questions inevitably follows.


The other thing Evelyn has discovered is that it is FUN to hide things. So we walk through the house finding all sorts of things crammed in the strangest places; ie. crayons shoved in the piano's hard drive, mashed potatoes hidden in the back of the lazy boy.... the list goes on! It wouldn't surprise me too much if she placed that mouse in the silverware drawer!

Being a parent certainly keeps you on your toes:

• picking up a child throwing a tantrum that is disturbingly similar to picking up a melted laffy-taffy--a very LOUD melted laffy taffy.


• having your child spit out anything they don't want to swallow in your lap: like a chewed walnut that resembles soggy sawdust saturated in saliva (say that 5 times fast!), or a chewed up grasshopper. or a fruit of the red berry variety that stains anything that looks at it wrong....


• getting so excited that your child is finally the age to go to nursery and then having her REFUSE to go.


• getting every minute flaw on your face or body poked accompanied with the sign "hurt"--repeated indefinitely.


• Books are fun to read, but they're so much more fun to rip into packing material!


• If the child is being too quiet, it's time to check on them. You never know what fun thing they've discovered that will turn you instantly into the incredible hulk.

But everything's looking up! I was talking to my sister Jane (who has a 2-year-old) for comfort yesterday, and she gave me something to look forward to: Potty Training. AAAAAAAAAGGGGHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Is it too late to change my mind about being a mom?

No, honestly being a mom is the best thing in the whole world. There's nothing better than watching your own posterity develop their own little personality...and yes, even gain their independence from you.

(*whew!* There, I said it.) After all, where would we get all our funny stories if it weren't for kids?

The object stuck to the door behind Evelyn is a slice of cheese. Who can help but love her?!